After Richard’s funeral we wrote thank you cards like crazy.

We sent one to just about everyone that signed our guest book at the funeral home. And to all the people that sent flowers or food. We sent out several huge piles.

We tried to avoid being too generic, and put personal notes in each card. We wanted to express our real gratitude for the love and support that so many had given us.

But we had to save some for later.

I find it so hard to express my feelings to these loved ones. The people that have shared our lives. People that shared Richard’s life. That enjoyed him and loved him. People that were feeling great pain from his loss as well as we were.

And now more than 4 months after the funeral they are still unwritten.

My mother-in-law fell this weekend and broke her hip.

I figured while sitting in her hospital room would be a good time to get these done.

I wrote to three sets of aunts and uncles. A couple of these traveled a great distance to be with us. They all went together and bought us a nice granite bench to put in the cemetery. I love them all a great deal. They’ve been a big part of my life. I feel guilty for taking so long to thank them.

Then I started writing to “the cousins.” These three ladies grew up with Richard. He loved them. They loved him. I don’t know if we would have made it through the funeral process without them.

I began with Hannah. She has referred to Richard as her “cousin slash big brother.” They were close in age so they shared all the big family events. They did First Communion together. Had Confirmation together. Both were August babies, so they had many combined birthday parties. While not attending the same schools, they graduated from high school the same year, and got to share in a family celebration of their accomplishment. They were both supposed to graduate from college this year.

Richard fell behind because of the medical issues. Something about a couple of brain surgeries seemed to slow him down. He told Hannah he had the brain surgery so she could finally have a party by herself.

For most of one school year Richard shared an apartment with Hannah and Shelby. Shelby is Hannah’s little sister and another of “the cousins.”

They were very close.

As I wrote the note to Hannah I started remembering all the times they had together growing up.  And how much they meant to one another. And my eyes started watering up.

It’s hard to write with tears in your eyes.

So I got 4 cards done.